Colorful day and a cup of tea.

No one can love me more than myself.

To be honest, I feel so content at the moment. Even though I am alone, I am not even lonely. You know at one point you feel its fine not to have what other people have, I've realized life is always like that. It depends on how we perceive it.

I wish I could tell someone that I am really fine now, because when I say things, people often feel sorry for me. They would go, "Oh its okay Syafa, you're a tough girl, you can face the world alone but someone might come along eventually you just need to hold on a little bit longer. But deep inside they would just feel pity for me. I know because even my parents feel the same.

I really dislike that. Not that I don't need that someone I just wish people could see the really okay me.
I just need them to know it is fine for me to think that commitment falls on the second place.

I start to think that I am fine being alone when I no longer get angry when people tease me about marriage. I can simply laugh along without feeling mad about it. I've tasted childish infatuation, I've felt one-sided love, I've faced betrayal and I've got over those phases. I've learned to accept what has been written. Yes things will come naturally but let the time decide. Everyone can be happy with their partner but why can't they feel the same without one? I am receiving so much love from my family and friends, there's a room for more but yes, I have enough not to let me suffer if I don't get any from so-called partner.

So yeah, if anyone read this, I just want to tell you that I am really, truly from the bottom of my heart, fine. I am not even lying, I am truly happy. I just don't want to waste another second feeling all blue.